The F word

I was torturing myself.
Pumping 7-8 times a day and barely getting enough milk for my baby. He's eating 36+ ounces a day now!

The other night I was in tears. He needed 9oz for his bedtime bottle but after depleting my frozen stash of breast milk over the past few weeks and pumping for eternity I only had 6oz! I bit the bullet and screamed the F word, FORMULA!

When I was pregnant, a doctors office sent me home with a sample of Similac. I scoffed and stuck it in the back of the pantry thinking, "I'll never use that!" Well, I swallowed my breast milk snobbery and made Santi his first bottle of formula. He gulped it down and I felt a HUGE weight lift off my shoulders.

Since then, Santi has 3 breast milk bottles and 1 formula bottle everyday. Nothing is as good for babies as breast milk and I'm happy Santi benefitted from 7 months of it exclusively. However, I'm thankful there is an acceptable alternative.

I will continue to pump and give him what's best for as long as I can. Including formula in his diet is not the end of the world. In fact it opens up a new world. One where I can relax a little more!

Pump it up

You have no idea how happy this makes me. When I open the fridge and see a row of bottles filled with breast milk I just jump for joy, it makes me SO happy!

Our hungry hungry hippo is now tipping the scale at 11.7lbs and is consistently eating 4+ ounces every 3 hours during the day. With his steady weight gain, we no longer have to fortify any bottles with formula, hooray! Just mom juice for Santi. So that means I have to make more milk than ever to guarantee he can eat.

It's amazing how the universe gives you exactly what you need, exactly
when you need it. After a few scares of my milk production decreasing, I'm finally making enough to be several feeds ahead of him and freeze some for later.

I'm sure I'm not the first person to have milk production issues. I have seen 5 lactation consultants over the past 2 months and I've learned so much. Here are my tips to keeping and boosting your milk production if you're pumping, but I'm sure these work for nursing moms too.

• Pump, pump, pump! Nothing can substitute or stimulate more milk production than pumping 8-10 times a day. The lactation consultants will tell you this from day one, you'll try to find a short cut but there isn't one. You MUST commit to pumping. Make it your job, make it your biggest priority!

• For heart moms: When Santi was in the hospital I took a few short videos on my phone of him crying. When I'd go home at night I'd watch the videos while I pumped, I called it "pumping porn," it helped so much. Just hearing your little love cry will get the milk going.

• Use a hospital grade pump. Rent one from the hospital or buy one, check eBay! Getting the Medela Symphony was a game changer for me. It has made the biggest impact on my production. Yes, a hospital grade pump is expensive, $1500 if bought new, but a year on formula is even more expensive $2500-$3500+.

• Most pumps have two modes, first it stimulates for 2 minutes then it switches to the stronger suction. As soon as it switches to the strong suction turn up the suction until it hurts then take it down one notch. This is advice from an LC and it works great!

• Use the second "let down" feature on your pump.

• If you're nursing, use your pump after you feed your baby. This tells your body that the baby is still hungry and you need to make more milk.

• You can take Fenugreek, Mothers Milk pills and drink lactation stimulating tea, but don't rely on it. Remember, nothing can substitute for actually pumping.

• Take care of yourself! Stay hydrated, eat enough calories and get rest when you can. I usually eat a snack and drink 20oz of water while I pump and another 20oz when I'm done. Plus, I just drink water all the time anyway. As much as I want to lose the baby weight, I do not restrict calories at all. Feeding my baby Santi more important. Sleep when you can. Sometimes I'm in bed as early as 8 or 9pm, depending on his schedule. Because I know I'll be up with him again at midnight and again at 4 or 5am.

Gosh, I've learned so much! This is probably TMI but I just pumped a record amount while writing this, 5oz on each side for 10oz total, holy moly! So maybe thinking about producing a lot while you're pumping works too! 

Hungry hungry hippo

It never crossed my mind that I wouldn't be able to breastfeed Santiago.

When I was pregnant, I bought nursing bras, tank tops and covers for nursing in public. I assumed that it would be easy. It's this natural things that mammals do, nurse our young. I have what he needs and I thought he'd instinctually know what to do and want to do it.

I was SO wrong. Breastfeeding is hard. Our situation was made even harder by several factors. His poor little heart doesn't have the stamina to work as hard as he needs to, to get the calories he needs to gain weight and then there was that awful nurse that gave him his first bottle. The bottle that derailed all previous work we did with the lactation nurse. Since then it's been all bottles. Just the sight of my boobs makes him scream with terror.

Sorry to sound like a milk snob, but I cant even think about giving him straight formula. Not at his age. I want him to have breast milk with all it's nutrients and antibodies. And that's what he gets. Yes, I do fortify with a high calorie formula to help him pack on the pounds, but not every bottle. Sometimes, I give him freshly pumped milk, nothing added, just pure mommy goodness.

Because of this determination to give him only the BEST, I spend 3+ hours a day pumping milk in 20 minute increments. I even pump overnight. After his 2am feeding, I stay up and pump, pump, pump.

Last week, I noticed my supply getting low and I freaked the F out! Every time I pumped, I seemed to get less and less milk. If I run out, he is left with nothing but formula. Just the thought breaks my heart and makes me feel
like a failure.

So I searched the Internet for milk making suggestions and found some advice. In addition to pumping religiously around the clock, I started taking fanugreek, more milk plus and drinking nursing support tea throughout the day. Plus I have some more supplements on the way.

I was skeptical at first, but the proof is in the output. It's working! Just in time too. Santi is now taking 90+ ml at each feed. I call him my hungry hungry hippo.